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Post by CrazyDave on Jul 12, 2005 23:19:17 GMT -5
Well well well!
I felt like posting this! So, I went ahead and did!
You like? You don't like? You confused about something? You a flaming douche bag?
Well, then, tell me all about it!
Signed.
David Hoffman
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Post by Winston on Jul 13, 2005 8:26:26 GMT -5
Oh.
My.
God.
Have my eyes decieved me?
Could this be what I, and probably most of the board population has been waiting for?
I love it!
Still great with the writing Dave, and the hillarity continues.
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Post by CrazyDave on Jul 13, 2005 14:48:05 GMT -5
Quick interlude goes....HERE!
ok, so, while I have.... Winston's, I guess, attention, I'd like to take a brief moment to discuss my writing style.
I usually write in a style that seems to fit either an anime or same style cartoon of sometype. This provides me with alot of different venues to express myself, but also comes with the occational problem.
PROS: 1:Character's always show their emotions in Anime's, wiether through sweat drops and facefaults, or through their expressions and movements. It's one of my favorite parts of the anime word. And it's something I work rather hard into my stories.
2: People can take HUGE amounts of Damage and then get up as if they were totally fine. Ex: FLAME! FLAME!FLAME! FLAME!FLAME! FLAME!FLAME! FLAME!FLAME! FLAME!FLAME! FLAME!.... you get it. It's a helpful way to show different sides of a story, plus slapstick is always funny as hell.
3: Suspenion of Belief. When people think of or see Anime, they aren't expecting a normal day in a normal life. They're expecting giant robots to crash through the wall while fighting a scantally clad android cat girl.... or something. The point is, screw logic. I personally think this helps a person believe what they see, and therefore helps them become emersed in the story.
4: All the needed Elements. Animes have (in general) music, sound effects, and other sounds, which I always think about when I write stories. I always have a theme song or musical moment prepare for each scene, which helps make the situation seem real.
CON:
Descriptions. Since I'm seeing this as an Anime style, I'm not too up and up on the descriptions of things around me. Now, personaly, I really don't care for descriptions, but I know other people do. While the lask of them may give a person free range to imagine their own scene, It may also give that person a different sense of the scene I see. And I'm always right because I'm the writer.
Actually, that's the only con I can think of right now....
Well, if you guys think of anything, feel free to post them too.
I'm going to TRY and write as much of this story as I can. I deals directly with Astaroc's past, however, and as long as D&D exists, this story will never be finished.
Hint hint, lets play D&D hint Hint.
Well...... bye, I guess.....
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Post by Winston on Jul 13, 2005 15:02:42 GMT -5
D&D gets kinda effed up with Mike & I's "falling out"
Who knows whatll go on.
Where's Pape when ya need him?
++I like your style Dave. I definitely see the anime vibe, and use it when imagining the story in my head.
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Post by RubberPiggy on Jul 16, 2005 0:37:21 GMT -5
((Before I start this post, I'd just like to say that some kind of GIANT BUG just crawled onto my arm, as I am here SITTING ON MY BED. The bleeding thing was IN MY BED! OH! It was so big and horrible! *shivers*))
And now...
WHY THE FUCK DID I NOT READ THIS SOONER?
Because you should have mentioned that it was the bloody ATR sequal!
((Holy shit, now any time I feel anything I'm freaking out thinking there's bugs on me again. Geeeee...))
Ha-HA, I am so glad to see Astaroc again! I missed him, I did. I love the humor, I love the way you tell the story- Gee whiz, Dave, we've gone through this so many times through ATR, you know that I LOVE all this stuff! I especially loved the argument with the sword. Bloody brilliant.
Bwaha, you know how much I LOVE your anime style. And I also loved your little description of it. Made your points very clear and I think you PROVED that this is a FANTASTIC way to write a story.
Just a few minor things I noticed:
Unless this story is somehow being narrarated by some character that can read Astaroc's thoughts, I don't think the narrator should ever be using first person.
I'm not sure if 'flush' is a spelling error/typo, or did you mean to do that because in his drunken state he's mispronouncing it?
COMMA! NEEDS COMMA! Sorry... *am a comma nazi*
Whoo for ATR sequel! Whoo for WTF! ((LOL! Brilliant!)) As for the story ruining D&D... honestly, I wouldn't worry about it. I highly doubt it's going to happen again before the summer is out. I would say go nuts with your story, because I don't think that the small possibility that we'll do D&D again should hold back the writing of this BRILLIANT STORY. So there.
Wheeness!
~RP~
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Post by CrazyDave on Jul 16, 2005 13:04:21 GMT -5
ok....lets see....
My Narrator, as you stated, is Actually Astaroc. Whenever things (People, places, ideas, Terrible jokes, etc.) are described, they're discribed through HIS eyes. And....welll..... Astaroc's a little.... insane, so talking to himself isn't exactly out of the ordinary.
Hee hee hee.....
#2 Yeah the 'Fluch' was caused by a drunken slurring of the word Flush. If you didn't understand, don't worry about it. He won't be getting drunk anytime soon... I think.....
The letter C: Oopps! I forgot the comma! Hee hee hee.... I'll try to remember that in the future, but I usually write through SOC (Stream of Conciousness) so little things like that are easily missed.
Last thoughts: Ok, so D&D is out, then.... well, Then I'm going to need something from all of you. I'll take the time to ask you privatly a couple of questions, and then I'll write the story together.
WEEEEE!!!!
The only question I have is, Why didn't anybodyu ask me what Sound and Flow is?
hm.............
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Post by RubberPiggy on Jul 16, 2005 15:33:10 GMT -5
I was actually wondering that...
~RP~
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Post by Winston on Jul 17, 2005 9:32:40 GMT -5
What is Wind and Flow? And who is Mr Silent?
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Post by CrazyDave on Jul 23, 2005 17:17:50 GMT -5
hee hee hee....
I'll never tell!
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Post by RubberPiggy on Sept 18, 2005 20:31:36 GMT -5
I have read... CHAPTER ONE!
First of all, big whoo for getting back to the story, yo! I reeeeally need to get back to mine, too...
And, well, you're off to an interesting start, here! Honestly, I thought the first half of the chapter kinda dragged a little, but then it picked up and got back into the spirit it's usually in. Whoo hoo! I loved Astaroc's quest for food, very funny. Also very funny was when we got inside Tye's head after Astaroc saved him. Good stuff, yo. Can't wait to see more. 'Couple things:
It must be Matt's fault- I'm noticing that repitition of words thing. Just... yeah, noticed that there....
Comma at the end, comma! That is not a sentence! Waahhhhhh... *cries*
Okay, that's it.
So what is a Omake, exactly, anyway? Sara has never heard this word before... Anyway, it was very funny and totally a great idea. I absolutely loved it.
~RP~
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Post by CrazyDave on Sept 18, 2005 21:14:15 GMT -5
Well, ok, first off!
1: The whole 'Friend" thing.....
Look, there are only a certain number of synonyms of "Friend" I can spell.... and I used them all.... ALOT. So, yea, I'll fix this later. Maybe. Or never, whatever...
2:......
Fucking english. .......Fuck.
3: Omake.
An Omake is a Japanese Idea which you take a moment from a show or story and make it funny. Or, it's just a collection of wierd stuff which is, hopefully, funny.
Meh. I like writting fake stuff. I will try to keep writting these.
Thanks for the CC, Sara!
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Post by Winston on Sept 18, 2005 21:36:09 GMT -5
I don't know Dave, this ep didnt seem to be as up to par as Im used to. I really couldnt get into it, and it was difficult to read.
Part of it was of course the mispellings and the grammar problems.
But I think I feel like the writing was almost forced. The scenes with Tye jumped around alot, and I had to read over it a few times to understand exactly what was going on. Plus the indescript names for the characters made the distinction confusing at times. The dialogue was confusing too, especially the whole "Yeah" not-"Yeah" part, kind of odd. Didnt understand it at all.
I guess thats all I got.
/runs to update his Nintendo Revolution post!!
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Post by RubberPiggy on Sept 18, 2005 21:43:17 GMT -5
That's right, the whole "Yeah" thing did confuse me. I didn't get it until after the whole thing was over, you know? And I do get what Winston means about the writing feeling forced to. Remember: Just because you are being tortured to write your story with great speed, that is no excuse spew out chapters without thinking your normal amount about it.
Sara is leaving now, over.
~RP~
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Post by Winston on Sept 18, 2005 23:18:49 GMT -5
3: Omake. An Omake is a Japanese Idea which you take a moment from a show or story and make it funny. Or, it's just a collection of wierd stuff which is, hopefully, funny. The literal translation for Omake is "Extra Bonus". Basically its an add on at the end of many anime and manga which are like skits, usually containing the authors, in a comedic short.
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Post by RubberPiggy on Sept 19, 2005 6:29:45 GMT -5
Aha. Neat! Thanks, Winston!
((Dude. I totally did NOT even notice Dave's post there until right now. Iee, sad.))
~RP~
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